Now I know this may be my Endo pain meds talking but I can’t help but share my current euphoric state. I can say that without a doubt I am deeply, madly and hopelessly in love . . . with my bathtub!
I live in a house built around 1925, with the original, deep bathtub. After years and years of living in apartments with shallow tub/shower combos, I finally have found the bathtub of my dreams. A nice, deep, solitary bathtub that allows the hot, relaxing water to cover my chest. (Men may not understand the need for such a thing but women everywhere get it).
If it were possible to marry an inanimate object, I would instantly give up my singleton status and vow to love, honor and cherish my deep tub until the day I die.
The tub embraces me with its warmth, calming and soothing me after a long, hard day at work. It envelopes me in healing, often bubbly, waters when I am filled with Endo pain and hugs me until the pain subsides. It cleanses my body and soul. And some women may agree with me that a long, hot bubble bath is often better than sex. (It never leaves you staring at the ceiling wondering when it is going to be over and there is never, ever, any need to FAKE an enthusiastic,satisfied response).
The bathtub will never ever tell me that it wants to date other women (cause bathtubs can’t talk). And the bathtub will never abandon me in my darkest moments.
So here I am, pledging my undying love for my bathtub to the whole world. I love you, Tubby. I hope I never have to live another day without you.